So, I've been gone for ages. Real life is not as nice as we all want it to be and I am so busy! It seems as though I never slow down!

My divorce was finalized early October. I did get moved and am working and doing single person things. It's been a huge change for me. I was married my (almost) entire adult life. I'm enjoying myself and excited about the future. I've even dipped my toes into the dating pool! I'm down 88 pounds. I'm wearing clothes sizes I haven't worn since I was 20 years old. It's an amazing feeling.

I hope the holiday season is blessed and joyful for you and that the New Year brings joys and blessings for you too!

End of Summer...End of an Era

I've mentioned before, more than once, that my life would be changing over the course of time. I knew, of course, that my weight loss would be a dramatic centerpiece of all the change and was happy for it. I'm down 62 pounds now and am over the moon with joy! I am officially smaller now than I was 6 weeks after delivering my son. I bought clothes in sizes I hadn't worn in 12 years. What a feeeling!

What I didn't realize was that other changes, changes I knew needed to be made, were just around the corner as well. So, here it is. I am getting divorced. In less than 4 weeks, I will be officially single. I am leaving here and moving 4.5 hours away. My son refuses to move again and will stay with his father. This has me gutted. It's been him and me for 12 years. His entire life...

Our divorce is not ugly. We are not trying to kill each other; we are not snarling and growling; we are not fighting tooth and nail over the vacuum cleaner or flatware. I like it this way. I wish anyone going through this upheaval, this daunting phase in life, could have such a drama-free separation. It's a great testament to the friendship we had 15 years ago that is still there, lurking beneath everything else, that we can be so kind and civil to each other. He's a good man...we just don't fit.

So, yeah. Changes. Life as I know it will be much different. But, I'm ready for a fresh start, willingly embracing the change and ready to fly.

Summer is here!

So, as I mentioned in the earliest days, I knew my life would be changing. I hoped for good changes and to be able to roll along with the not so great ones and just keep putting one foot in front of the other until I end up somewhere amazing.

So I'm trying to do that! Here's what's happening...

1) I got a job today. Yay me!
2) I am floating the Guadalupe River for the first time ever with several people I know and several I've never met. Love making new friends!
3) That new swimsuit I bought is going to have to hold out because I'm down 54 pounds now!

That's all just happening between now and mid-June. What else could be around the corner for me? I don't know, but hang on and we'll find out together!

Wow! It's been a month since I posted anything. Oops.

I'm down 47 lbs now and, indeed, I purchased a new swim suit. It's absolutely adorable and I love it! Most of the things I'm buying now are 4 sizes smaller than when I began this journey and that makes me happy. It's been a lot of years since I've been this size!

This journey is long and difficult. There's no easy fix to all this; it's all work no matter which route you take. I'm still in the gym, though I've discovered that I actually don't like it At All. I still go three times a week and try to walk on days that I'm not in the gym. I'm not perfect, but I get up and try something everyday.

I suppose that's all any of us can do each day. So, as long as we're doing and trying, we're moving somewhere!

Down 40 lbs!

Meeting with a trainer today to see just how far I've come and to set up a new workout. Hopefully, we can speed up this process a little. The entire process still feels too slow!

On the absolute upside: I'm down 2 pants sizes and I absolutely MUST buy a new swimsuit! My old one is falling off! I never thought I'd see the day when I was excited to swimsuit shop!

Down 38 pounds! Finally some scale movement! I'm still strength training and working the treadmill 3-4 times a week. I still don't love it, but I'm OK with that.

All this work, it's for me and dammit, I'm so worth it. Feels good to do for myself....can't believe it took me so long to figure it out!

Happenings

Sorry I've been so out of the loop! I've been substitute teaching, working out and getting frustrated over lack of scale movement! However, I have gone down a size in trousers, this makes 2 sizes, so I'm less frustrated than I was.

I'm strength training 3 days a week and running the treadmill those same 3 days. This week, I'm shooting for 4 days as a general rule. I started off on the treadmill walking about 20 minutes. I am now running 30 minutes at a time and yesterday, reached one of my goals. 1.5 miles running by Spring Break. Well, I ran 1.52 miles yesterday and Spring Break isn't for 2 more weeks!

The scale is a major validator and it's frustrated to see the numbers move so S-L-O-W-L-Y as in about 3 pounds the last many (7?) weeks. However, with the reduction in trouser size and all, I must be losing inches. So, I've decided the scale cannot, will not, be my only validation! Endurance level, clothing size and muscle growth is very important and a great indicator of the good I'm doing my body, no matter how damned slowly the scale moves!

So, as much as I'd like the scale to move, I must look to all else I'm doing to see the big picture. The journey I'm on is one not so much of weight-loss as it is a journey of self-discovery. One that I can hopefully realize just how strong and capable I am and just how much I really do love myself. After all, that's the entire impetus for the life changing decisions I've made. I'm worth it, you know, and it was high time I started treating myself how I deserve!